Always Angry

I've always been a fan of superhero movies, X-Men, Spiderman, Batman, Wonderwoman... you name it. These quarantine season I've always had the quote from The Hulk in the Avengers movie. 
Steve Rogers:
Dr. Banner! Now might be a good time to get angry.
Bruce Banner:
That's my secret, Captain. I'm always angry. [Morphs into the Hulk and punches the Leviathan]
I find this highly relatable, I'm always sore. Not in a bad way. Let's say I have made friends with it. It's quite hard to explain. But maybe I do like putting myself in situations that are not exactly comfortable. And in doing that, each time I do I create a bit more awareness. What am I doing in that situation? Most of the time I try to avoid the pain, the awkward moments. But when I catch myself doing that, I try to do two steps back and find the pattern and think, what can I do better at this movement. Then I think maybe I can do this instead. And it is hard to do different when we know something is already working and working well. The comfortable, the normal. But sometimes we are pushed into situations to do different. 

I've always been troublesome. When someone tells me it's not possible, something in me lights up and tells me, yeah you can do that. I am not sure if it is a devil or an angel, maybe it's both. 

So yes. Failure is an option. Most of the time it is the result of the action. Most of the time we see things when it's already working. We don't see the gruelling process. We see the final product and not the drafts before. I think the secret is be ok with sucking at it. Being ok with failing. Be ready to be able to dust yourself, laugh at yourself and pick yourself back up and try again. It's the wanting to do the work. It's messy. It's confronting. It is difficult but it is also very satisfying and just fun. 

People want results. They want it fast. We are living in where everything is served on a silver platter. And yes. There is nothing wrong with that. Some people did the work for this to be possible. And it was not an easy work as we somehow dismiss. We also do not have to reinvent the wheel. But we also cannot take for granted that somethings it really calls for hard work and surrender and trust. 

Understood? Me too, I don't really understand. Hahahaha. Anyway. Moving on. Just a bit of changes in the schedule for next week. For Tuesday and Thursday afternoons, if you want to come to class let me know in advance. I am happy to be there but for now there is not a need for them so I will make those classes on demand. Thank you for understanding. Any other questions. Please let me know. I like hearing from you guys.

Stay safe. Stay happy. Stay angry. Stay sore. 


Love always,
J