Grateful

Everyday seems to start later. The days are beautiful and the nights are long. The body wants to stay up late and enjoy the sunlight the world is offering and the warm cozy bed. I have to admit, I'm not online at 6 AM. It's getting more like 7. But thanks to everyone coming it gives me a reason to get up. I know no dependency but somehow it helps to know that I am there with someone stretching out the 'evils' that are trapped in the body. It helps to have a routine to keeps going and seeing you on the other side, having the same experience. Struggling sometimes, fighting through it and persevering. It inspires me. 
 
The ashtanga practice is quite helpful for this. Because it has structure and it doesn't let me have to think so much. Why this, why that. Starting this practice 7 (I think) years ago I was trying my best to understand everything. Till this day, all I know is I know very little. But one of the things I know is that there is something about it. Something almost 'magic' if you indulge me in saying that. It is something I cannot explain. It just happens. When we were young we are vessels of learning. We accept what is told to us as truth, as we grow older, we learn to reason, and in a way to distrust and we start to question why, before accepting something as truth. It is due to a lot of factors, good and bad alike, that makes us think this 'magic' has an explanation behind it and I want to know the trick first before I believe it. And learning becomes harder, we don't absorb so easy. We want to apply our truth and our experiences - absolutely nothing wrong with that as the human brain was made to think - it is a beautiful design and it adapts itself. We keep at it. Everyday grasping a little bit. 

Classes are there everyday of the week. I may be late but I will be there. Doing the best I have that day and happy to share this journey with you. I'm transcribing my pointers for practice on YouTube. Having new content there is helpful for my own structure. It helps me keep my own projects in place. I feel conscious recording these videos but they are also fun to make and takes my understanding of the practice in a different level. Hey, speaking and doing is very hard to do at the same time. ;) As always feedback and questions are very much appreciated.

Death, it comes to everyone right? And in this times it does seem close, family and friends, friends of friends, family of family. In the end we are all connected after all so we are all family and friends. Ones loss is somehow felt, it is someone's friend, someone's family that are in the numbers. It could have been in ours. And it is mentally exhausting. The unknowing where this ends. What will happen next. This is out of our structure lives of study, work, build a family... It was not on the list - something like this halts our plans, of life, of living. Maybe this is part of the learning, that for now we have to accept that we don't understand and we can only be empty vessels like child and be open to what is gonna come next, children filled with great intentions and with hope for a better future, for us and for the next generations. With death is life is very much present too. For both are coexisting and one cannot be there without the other. One gives way to the other, and one highlights the other. 

I stay grateful to you. For being my support. For showing me kindness and love in this period of difficulty. I am grateful to those who share their time, energy and money. You are my support. thank you for letting me keep doing something I really love and I am passionate about. From the bottom of my heart, thank you.  

We are a different version of ourselves from when we started the lockdown. Our pre-lockdown selves are 'dead' but we are very much alive and kicking. How much magic is in that? Pretty much a lot to be grateful for. As always, I remain here for you, always grateful, always laughing and smiling and being silly, always absorbed with the magic. 
​
Love always,
J